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8:27 p.m. - 2004-09-08 We get the weirdos at Midtown PalletI don't know if it is the Pallet industry as a whole that attracts the nut cases or just our little corner of the pallet world. The nature of the business lends itself to dealing with strangers, after all it is a recycling business. We buy pallets from people off the street and it just so happens that the kind of people who scavenge for a living are real characters. However, some of our adventures have nothing to do with scavengers or pallets. Our scariest story involved The Love Muffin. Ever since the divorce, he doesn't sleep well. He gets jumpy and nervous and gets up at 3 in the morning and then gets antsy and just comes into work early. Howard gave him a key and he sits at a desk with his laptop and analyzes the stock market. In the winter, he starts up everybodys trucks so that they are nice and warm and ready to go by 6:00AM. One winter morning, he arrived as usual, and it happened to be an unusually warm morning. He decided not to start the trucks up and went directly into the office. At 6:OO AM, he went to start up his truck and found a drivers license that belonged to a black lady, on the seat. His sweatshirt jacket was gone and there was some change and an empty coffee cup in the cup holder and his headphone wires were yanked out of his headphones. He assumed that it was a homeless woman who had spent the night in the cab of his truck and called the police to turn over the drivers license. He thought nothing more about it until the police came to Midtown pallet wanting to talk to him. About 1/2 mile down the street is Illinois 31, a state route. Across 31 is a cemetary and in the cemetary an old farmhouse that we thought housed the office of the cemetary staff. Aparently there was an apartment above the offices rented by a single middle aged women who worked at the Sears Corporate headquarters. Apparently, Larry's "homeless" lady went directly from spending the night in the truck to this lady's home and stabbed her 50 or 60 times, scalped her, and then set the farm house on fire to cover her crime. She stole the woman's credit cards, check book, cash and car and they found her hiding in it in Joliet after spending all of her booty at the river boat casino. All we can think about is how lucky Larry was that he didn't start the trucks that night. We wondered if the cord that was stripped from the headphones would have been used to strangle him if he had come upon her. What a creepy feeling to know that such a derranged killer was right in our lot, in one of our trucks. Last week, we had a yahoo show up named Martin Stamper. He looked like a Martin Stamper. He had an old junk car and brought in about 40 pallets, 5 at a time, strapped to the roof of his car which had Texas plates on them. Martin Stamper had a thick, yawling, Texas accent to match. He appeared to be in his early 30's and had this young thing with him. At first we thought it was his daughter, but the way she talked made it sound like she was his girlfriend. She couldn't have been more than 13 or 14, certainly no older than 15. There was something about Martin Stamper that gave me the creeps right away. He was boisterous and rowdy, dirty and disshevled and had an evil glint in his eye. He constantly talked about needing a beer. Martin Stamper brought us pallets 3 days in a row. Monday, Labor day, he showed up and Midtown Pallet was closed. Larry happened to be there using our internet connection and took Martin's pallets in, about $70.00 worth. Since Larry didn't have access to the checking account, he gave Martin a receipt. Martin then borrowed 9.00 off of Larry for beer, and said he would be back Tuesday with more pallets and to get his money. Tuesday came and went and Martin Stamper did not come. We commented that the daddy of that little girl probably caught up with him and he was either dead or in jail. From the first time we saw him, we all pretty much branded him as the type of guy who could easily be doing prison time. By noon today, Martin Stamper still had not shown up for his money. Dan made a crack that he was going down to the gas station for a newspaper so he could see what Martin Stamper had gotten arrested for. We all laughed. Dan returned with the paper and Howard opened it up and started laughing. There on page 2 was the story of Martin Stamper who was awating his hearing scheduled for Sept. 17 in Kane County Jail for stealing an automobile. There was no mention of the little girl. I hope she finds her way back to her family. I have mentioned before that all the oddballs seem to find me and in an extention of myself, wouldn't you know that I would choose to work for a company who all the looney tunes seem to find. P. I. Yarnsmith
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